☆ pablo

it’s been fifty four days 

since april twenty sixth

I offered everything I had —

my future and my life span cut in half 

but I’m sorry that wasn’t enough for the universe to budge  

I held your lifeless body  

to the point I memorized the texture of your fur

just by picturing it  

engraved it in my hands 

knowing I’d never feel it again  

I keep being told to “move on”

but a part of me left with you  

a part of me is still in that room 

 

I can’t say your name out loud 

without breaking down 

I kept your first toy from your first vet visit 

scattered your pictures everywhere 

but nothings enough 

not when im sick with missing you

If my tears could bring you back 

you’d be here wrapped in my arms

you didn’t get to pop balloons this year 

dig through tissue paper 

but you were my gift 

I had you since you were four weeks old 

I don’t remember much in life 

except everything about you 

every smile 

every blink

every bark 

every breath

you were everything good

I don't know what I’ll do in this world that would make me worthy of ever having you 

I soulmated so hard 

you brought me back to God

I’ll get right with him  

make it to the pearly gates 

just to ask to see you again 

te extraño con todo mi ser

estás lágrimas que derramo por ti

nunca van a parar 

no las desprecio

sirven como recuerdos 

de cuanto te voy a seguir queriendo 

ayer, hoy, mañana y

para siempre