☆ deleted ur song files













i hold a nice melody 

put in the work so it can be heard 

but i was sampled like songs 

and written all wrong 


deleted my soundcloud 

to erase the trace of my plays —

as if that could undo the pain he gave.

and in his songs, I’ll stay the same,  

forever embedded in verses, 

as something he shaped 


given the same fate 

as the girl before me —

put on display as something im not 

to avoid what he’s done 

but i get to keep the version of myself 

the one he never intended to meet


“Insecure”

everytime his lies came undone 

“You’re your own worst enemy”

his voice no longer soft 

“I don’t care how it makes you feel” 

tainted by what he could no longer hide

“I’ve never done anything to hurt you”

as I tried to blur out texts, 

the girls engraved in my head  

and the fact I’m allergic to latex but had them on him  


I loved through my worst days

but I’m the first he exchanges when chaos fills his mind

atleast I’m the first he picks to trade , replace , and waste


out of fear leaving was all I’d ever known so he made me feel like I found home just to change the locks without a sound and now being shut off feels safe somehow


swore he’d never do that to me but it was plain to see 

me pregunto si sentías ansiedad cada vez que perdías mis calls 

que tu alma no te dolía en saber que tu piel ya no era mía

urges hid and secrets kept 

lo que en silencio me hizo llorar ahora lo presume sin ocultar 

no guilt in their bones 

he’s now free to do in public what once broke me in silence    


an avoidant lost inside his mind

now just a name I’ve left behind

a memory with no more weight

a past I no longer long to recreate

a memory I no longer dread

a costless thought I’ve long since shed


I begged to feel seen 

I wonder what it’s like to not be misunderstood 

too much or never quite enough—

It’s tragic… that I once called that love


(Reprise)

no need for blame 

no final word

no last regret

Just feelings we’ll forget


Two bodies near, two souls apart,

and miles between each heart

I thought love meant holding tight but letting go felt right

se hace el ardido por lo k el solito ha destruido y ahora te duele sin razón el peso entero de tu propia traición 

and you may not miss the way I stayed,

The gentle roles I softly played

but it’s okay, not all love is built to last

some bloom, then live inside the past


taught me about absence,

not through distance but

right beside him 


I’ll play the villain, keep the victim, 

two souls divided

and me so desperately trying 


In the end, he may not recall my name

but I feel no anger, I cast no blame.

no bitter words

no need to defend the soft ache of my truth in the end 


I’ve begun to plant seeds where roots grow and where water won’t drain but flow 

some love stories don’t get a second act and not every love is meant to last but each one leaves a quiet trace that shows us when it’s real it won’t slip away or leave us with our heart to mend. 


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

☆ i’d hate u if I could

☆ ur heart tatt done in red ink